Today I found a lump in my throat. Concentration lost. Thoughts flee from class discussions; pondering the future. Travel the world? Leaving behind lovers and ones loved once. Selfishness or charity? It is my hourglass, not yours. God gave me the sand? Darwin gave me the sand? Either way, it is spilling faster than before. Too good to die right now. Only the good die young; only the good are remembered. Mother, I am worried about my health. Yes, you told me so. I am afraid of needles, forgive me. Roll your eyes. Slide the lid. Carve the stone. Lower the casket. Who needs a casket? I hope you enjoy the food. I held my niece today. I am an uncle. Newborn. Juxtaposition. Tears never reach my dry lips. What are goals? Do you really want my opinions? I still don’t know who I am. Who will I not become? How many worms will I feed? Let me find that stranger, I once depended on. My best friend in this lonely, harsh, confused world. Be true to your heart through betraying your mind. Rational thinking only leads to misery. Wish away your fears. Believe in Him. You have to want it. Bathe your brain in lidocaine. Follow your heart. Follow in the footsteps of the righteous. They follow the footsteps of their heart’s whispering. Psst… it’ll all be okay—soon enough.